Momma
Tuesday, April 10, 2012
Four years
Oh my sweet Emmalee. How can it be four years already? For some reason I have been anticipating this day coming for awhile and now it is finally here....you would have been four years old today! It is so bittersweet...for I know that you are fully healed and running and playing and praising Jesus in Heaven but I think of all that we have missed out on here with you and all that we would have been doing. At four you would be so independent not needing your momma to help you get dressed or helping you with anything probably! And we would have been looking into preschools for you to go to next year and you would be riding a bike. I'm sure my refrigerator would be covered in drawings and if you were anything like me I would be finding you little containers to collect all your "treasures" in :) Or...maybe you would be recovering from another surgery and maybe your heart would be so weak that you couldn't run outside and maybe we'd still be praying for your miracle of complete healing. It's thoughts like that that keep me going, knowing you are right where you belong...no matter how much I miss you! Oh Emmalee, you came into this world as a tiny 6 pound baby four years ago at 3:16 p.m. and you stole all our hearts...especially your mommas (and your daddy's!) and we miss you so! But we know that God had bigger plans for you and your short, sweet life and we give him praise all the time for you (and all your brothers!) and we are so grateful that we even got a chance to know you! When we first heard of your heart condition the doctors weren't even sure that we would get to meet you ever but you were a fighter and you came out strong and ready to live! We treasure ever day, hour, minute and second that you were here with us and we can not wait to be reunited with you again! But until then we will continue to tell others about you and about the awesome God that we served...the God that gave us you and the God that performed many miracles in your life...and the God that ultimately healed you and brought you to live with Him forever...and the God that is holding you now until we can again! God is good all the time! Emmalee, Happy Birthday sweet baby girl! We love you!!!
Wednesday, February 8, 2012
Feb. 8, 2012
My Dear Owen and Cooper-
It does not even seem possible that it has been three years since we briefly met on this earth. I still remember the day of your birth like it was yesterday. I was so sad that day because I was so not ready to be done carrying you. I had just started to feel you move inside of me and I cherished every kick and wiggle that I felt. I was so sad because I knew that you were not going to be staying with me...I was not going to get to watch you grow up...your dad wouldn't have two little helpers...I was just so sad. But the moment you were born I had this complete joy as I watched both of you take your teeny tiny breaths on my chest and I could see your little chests going up and down and see your little hearts just beating...those 19 minutes for you both (I still can't believe you both lived 19 minutes) were minutes I will never forget as long as I live. And as sad as I was I knew that you were going to be fine...you were going to be joining your big sister in Heaven and you were going to be held in the arms of Jesus...it doesn't get any better than that :) But on your birthday I just wanted to tell you that I still miss you and I love you. You will always have a piece of my heart until I am made whole again...when we meet again...in Heaven :) And I am sure that you are all too busy to be checking in on your momma down here but me and your daddy are doing good...your sister Natalee and your brother Bennett keep us really busy and we can't wait until they get old enough for us to tell them about you two and Emmalee and Oliver. And...we are going to be getting another sibling for you in April...how cool is that?!?! Pretty cool! :) Well I will wrap this letter to you up and hope that you had a great birthday in Heaven...I can't wait to get up there and try the cake :) I bet it is AMAZING!!
I love you two...until we meet again!
Mommy
It does not even seem possible that it has been three years since we briefly met on this earth. I still remember the day of your birth like it was yesterday. I was so sad that day because I was so not ready to be done carrying you. I had just started to feel you move inside of me and I cherished every kick and wiggle that I felt. I was so sad because I knew that you were not going to be staying with me...I was not going to get to watch you grow up...your dad wouldn't have two little helpers...I was just so sad. But the moment you were born I had this complete joy as I watched both of you take your teeny tiny breaths on my chest and I could see your little chests going up and down and see your little hearts just beating...those 19 minutes for you both (I still can't believe you both lived 19 minutes) were minutes I will never forget as long as I live. And as sad as I was I knew that you were going to be fine...you were going to be joining your big sister in Heaven and you were going to be held in the arms of Jesus...it doesn't get any better than that :) But on your birthday I just wanted to tell you that I still miss you and I love you. You will always have a piece of my heart until I am made whole again...when we meet again...in Heaven :) And I am sure that you are all too busy to be checking in on your momma down here but me and your daddy are doing good...your sister Natalee and your brother Bennett keep us really busy and we can't wait until they get old enough for us to tell them about you two and Emmalee and Oliver. And...we are going to be getting another sibling for you in April...how cool is that?!?! Pretty cool! :) Well I will wrap this letter to you up and hope that you had a great birthday in Heaven...I can't wait to get up there and try the cake :) I bet it is AMAZING!!
I love you two...until we meet again!
Mommy
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